This is so… oh, I’ll let you decide!

Grasshopper KL Concert 2010.    2010 吉隆坡 草猛忘我演唱会

23/1/2010, Sunway Surfbeach.

We, 5 988 DJs went on stage to open the concert, and we sang and danced before a crowd who paid for a good concert. I hope we didn’t ruin the party…. 😛

Thanks Jen and gang for shooting this for us.

All in a week

It was a very dramatic week for me. I had the worst and best experiences.

Early in the week, I had to fight back emotion to stay calm on air. I displayed too much emotion than a pro radio DJ should. There were a few instances whereby I couldn’t even come out with words on the first night when I talked about the kids in Penang. The second night was better controlled, but I really wish I don’t have to go through this kind of emotion in future, let this be the last we will every have to experience.

Two days later, the gig I was looking forward to turn out to be a disaster. I had some legendary pop stars on stage with me. I felt like an idiot. That is the closest I could describe. I didn’t perform well. I wanted to put the blame on others but I know I couldn’t, it was me who didn’t know how to handle the situation. I am glad the press played it down, though they can’t help themselves describing the event to be full of embarassing moments, I think they are very kind not to attack this host. Thank you reporters, you are so kind. However, this marks the lowest point of my emcee career.

I have to admit I got cold feet after, wanted to pull out from any the other stage gig. Feeling tired, I pulled out from Friday night cny promotional gig for the station, also because I knew they didn’t need me anyway.  However, there is another stage gig on Saturday afternoon; but there is another voice in me telling me the best way to gain back confidence is to get into the same task and perform better. After my failure in seeking for replacement, I knew I had to do it.

I bought myself a new coat, which cost more than the pay I get for my Saturday gig. Well, I meant to buy one to attend my good friend’s wedding lunch on Sunday anyway. That afternoon, I went on stage totally being myself. I am glad I had that chance. It was encouraging. The guest from Taiwan, the organiser and the location manager gave their compliments after. Thank you guys. I need them badly. And that was a good bounce back.

The same evening, I went on stage again, infront of a concert crowd with my fella 988 Djs, to dance and sing. The tune and dance step have been playing in my mind ever since we first practice on Thursday. I am not good at memeorising anything, being lyrics or dance steps. I knew I had to work harder than anyone. And it was fun. I remembered everything, said, sang and danced everything according to plan, though I wouldn’t say I did them well, but it was a fun experience.

And the next day, Sunday, I hosted a wedding lunch with my friend William, for another good friend of ours KitKat. It was probably the best wedding event I have ever emceed. We had fun on stage, it was grand and touching at moments. The hall was fabulous, perfect deco, amazing lighting, wonderful sound system, lovely food and surprisingly well controlled stage effects which includes waterfall-fireworks… everyone had a great time! It is a wedding KitKat has been dreaming for and I am glad we managed to deliver.

I think the coat I bought in TopMen is now my lucky coat. 🙂

I feel blessed. Very blessed.

I used to be them, and they are forever.

I was trying very hard to find an explanation for my emotional reaction to the Penang Dragon Boat incident.

I have been very close to teenagers for the past few years due to my lecturing engagements, and also through frequent interaction with them through my late night radio programme. They tell me stories of their lives, the problems they have with fellow schoolmates, teachers, families, school activities. They share their joy when they achieve their goals, their sorrow when they felt like they have failed. They tell me how bored they are when school is off, and how they enjoy falling asleep listening to my show. Every post in fb, every sms that was sent in, brings back memories of myself when I was a secondary school student. The days when life is about school activities, pop songs, radio,  friends, exams and tuitions.

My relationship with the youth of this generation grew even closer when I played a minor role as experienced-senior-DJ in the Youth DJ Camp organised by the station. Students who participated in the camp are very much like my old self. They are active, sincere and hardworking. Their energy is bottomless.

Though I have strived to be more positive last year, and was very dedicated to my new career, there was always a part of me that felt like a faded photograph, a drained old DJ.

The energy of the teenagers made me felt revived after the Camp. I wasn’t putting up a show when I hopped-up-and -down with them on stage (and to my surprise, they were very receptive to my uncle-moves and uncle-talks). I felt like I was 17 again, when I was a youth leader in all sort of extra curriculum activities, when we believed anything is possible, when striving for excellence was the only target.

They are so full of life, so full of hope, so full of dreams. I used to be them. Though I may not be them now, I realise the me I used to be is still in me. The faded photograph may be old, but the spirit has now been revived.

I became more positive, confident and concentrate, and I credit the teenagers for it.

Hence, the sorrow I felt hit me bad when 5 young boys and a young teacher drown in the Penang Dragon Boat incident. I spoke to some of their closest friends, who are just as full of life as any 17 years old is. I hear them tear up when talking about friends whom they take as brothers, blaming themselves for the tragedy just because they need to feel the sorrow. I read about their families’ sorrow for lossing children who are committed to making life wonderful. 17 is probably the fondest of my teenage memories, and the friendship I had then, has now flourished into strong ties. It is heartbreaking to see them lossing friends who could have been friends of a lifetime.

I read in newspaper today, the victims’ circle of friends have made a pledge to set their handphone alarm to 1700 daily for the rest of their living days, in remembrance of friends lost on 17/1/10. That is touching.

To the APOM gang, boys and girls of CLHS, families of the victims, I have asked you to be strong, to remember them as they were; now I would like to ask you to remember this very moment when you think you have lost them forever, in fact, they are now in you, as your source of energy for your every next step in life, cause you will remember them as souls full of life, full of hope, and full of dreams. That will not change.

They are forever.

Audio: My interview with the CLHS boys on 19/1/10

p/s: This is written in English, cause I want you to know how important you were, and still are to me, my friends of SPI. Please take good care of yourself.